Monday, June 2, 2008

Trauma

I can't believe I'm saying this, but I think I need to go back to a shrink.

I went to counseling for about six months and I stopped going in January. This last situation has really got me thinking about going back. I actually think I will.

I honestly think I'm traumatized. My hands shake, my back aches, and I want to throw up and the idea of going home. Yesterday when I was in the shower, I felt like I heard my mom screaming from the other side of the door. I literally turned off the shower and stuck my head outside just to check. Today I keep hearing the phone ringing! I was laying hear and I told my aunt the phone is ringing, and then I questioned it. And I said, "It is ringing right?" I got up and looked up at the phone sitting in front of the TV and realized that it was all in my head. I keep hearing the Cingular ring tone, the one my mom's Blackberry plays when it rings. Everything in my head is a jumble and I'm starting to hear things. I'm going to start hallucinating next...

Fuck. This isn't fair.

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